Instinct

I think I know myself pretty well. I have a very good sense of things, or at least I think I do. But when it comes to love and matters of the heart, I second guess, third guess, and fourth guess myself. I don't totally trust my actions, when it comes to love, because they tend to be heavily motivated from fear, hurt and pain. I recognize there is a need to step away from what I believe, because what I normally believe is pessimistic. As a way to balance this, I try to step out there, when I feel like it's right. When I feel like the only thing holding me back is my negativity, I push aside and I continue on. But it seems like lately, those same feelings that I ignore because of distrust, were actually warning bells. If I'd listened to those same thoughts, that were telling me to stay away, and actually STAYED AWAY, the heartbreak I thought I would avoid, wouldn't have come. *sigh* I don't know. When your threshold for love and relationships, comes from a tainted place, how do you determine when what's good and you just perceive it negatively, and what's just plain negative?

There are a lot of wolves in sheep's clothing out there. Sometimes you can't help but fall, people put a lot of time and energy into coaxing you out of the cave, unto the landing, convince you lean over the cliff, and then all it takes is one light push...and you've fallen.